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John Maccain said "I happen to know something about Veitnam..."
The name of this rant is pronounced k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d
appeal, exception, loop hole.
Fucking shoot me.
"Let go the sword playa, let go the sword!" -Coleman
Jill, Phil, Will, Roufus, Geore we miss you, Jimmy, Killer, Angie, Ringo?, Cysil, and Sarah. Big Family.
Not having any over due bills for the first time in a very long time is almost a zen like experince.
"I love you shut up" should be one word.
Fuck.
"Americans love to get even." - Toby Keith
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Just so you know when you say anything about your sign I stop listening.
I exist. If this is an incorrect assumption then it is irrlevant to debate anything since nothing is happening. Also the world around me exsits exaclty or so closely to what I sence as to make no difference. Once again life quickly loses meaning and direction if one assumes that it doesn't fucking matter.
"I happen to know something about Veitnam..." - John McCain
I am the Dark Lord of the Pit, so don't throw a fit.
Something working doesn't make it a good idea.
You are not fat. Annoying, stubborn, out of your fucking mind, determinded to be sad, bitchy, moody, unreasonable, uncareing, dishonest all those sometimes. But you are not fucking fat. What don't you fucking get about that? Are you just trying to fucking drive me out of my mind? But for the love of god look in the mirror. No one looks like the women you "hate." But you don't hate them because they don't exsist. They don't look like that don't you get it? I don't really care, but either loose the weight or shut up. The other day some random ho out in public said something about someone saying something about her and I lost it. I just yelled and fucking insulted her in every fucking way I could. You don't get it, and I don't really ever expect you to but it's not about your weight. The idea that someone could love you and not just want a skinny girl might be beyond you fine whatever loose the weight if you want but just fucking do it you stupid cunts. Just look in the fucking mirror and say I want to look like what ever and fucking do it. Throw up, go on attkins, starve I don't fucking care anymore. I think there is a pole danceing work out do that. Just no more bitching to me that I am not sensitive to your fucking problem. Your problem isn't your fucking weight it is that you don't like your self. "Fat" girls worry about skinny women, skinny women worry about easy women, small tited women about big and big titted about small. Cosmo has made you insane and you fucking know it but you just keep fucking playing the god damned game. Please if you love me stop have some self worth. I am begging. Christ have mercy they know not what they do.
I guess you stopped. Treachous bitch.
I have replaced sleeping with crying. It's sort of the same in that I have traded something I enjoyed that made me feel rested for something that leaves me drained and missing her even more.
I am so fucking alone, oh christ someone help me.
I've listend to the same 5 sad songs 400 times. I hate you so much. I am typing by feeling, since the tears won't let me see the monitor. You whore. Why?
Jay Z's Big Pimping is not helping. Some of us here at the Empire take solaice in Beck, but I for one perfer Clint Black Killin' Time. If you go with it skip track one, or you will want to die.
I need a hair cut and to do laundry. I think my cat pissed in my room. I keep telling myself I'll do something about it tomarrow. I might. Or I might stay up all night feeling like shit.
The weasal is awake, and somehow that too must be your fault.
I got all her shit together, only took 3 days. And I am keeping the kids.
k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d THIS ONE SHOULD BE EASYk d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d k d d k k d k d k d k d k d k d k d
I don't want to die, I just don't want to live like this.
For those of you who missed it I'm a little pissed right now.
How long till it's creepy when I hit on 18 year old chicks? I don't want to grow old alone and creepy. Alone wouldn't be THAT bad but Christ I don't want to be creepy.
I bare my soul to the world sometimes, and this is what I get. And people seem a little surprised when I have a shell. I let it down and get laced into me about 100% of time.
Wonder why.
And I thought we where doing a lot better.
The upside is I found a CD I had thought lost.
"Here comes the night dark as my soul...
I must have been dreaming
I must have been blind
I never thought that you could be so unkind
Tomarrow I'll forget you
But I can't forget you now"
- Here Comes the Rain
I'm not the Raptor Lord, or the kids dad anymore. Just can't do it alone. Peep ain't no fun, no one to defeat or be defeated by. No brains for eating, and for once I am REALLY REALLY not a canibal.
When you hear god you know. God always sounds ammused.
Christ you could have called me. After all this time I didn't even know you wanted me too.
I finally got up the nerve to go on a date. With a girl. I got stood up in the worst way ever, getting the wrong address. So their I stood with dasies in hand (her favorite) excited at my big chance to do right by a girl. No history, no bad feelings, no guilt. And no girl. She had given me the wrong address. I knew the guy their, Dan. I told him I had just looked at it wrong. I ended up sitting on a bench for a long long time. I just couldn't belive that had happened. It was a cold night and my hands hurt for days. Part of this whole thing is a horrible feeling that men like me only ever get one chance, and I fucked that up. I know I deserve better, I know that I want one. I don't know that I will get one. At some point I became a monster just to stay alive, and to stay sane. Good to know that trying to change gets you no credit. Okay Disinherited Knight did, but that is it.
I have been working on this rant on and off for years.
