|
|
I will not be ignored.
Wow. I've even fucked up being a fuck up.
At this point human stupidity should not amaze me.
Why didn't I get her number?
Because I'm stupid.
I must have control.
"Slow like honey, heavy with mood."
-Fiona Apple, Slow Like Honey
"Death is like taking off a tight shoe."
-Ram Dass
"Dreams can be deceiving."
-Fiona Apple, Slow Like Honey
I may very well die alone and bitter.
Would the you from way back slap you for the shit you're doing/into now? If so, you're probably fucking up.
I may be alone but at least it will be an unclusterfucked, orderly type lonliness.
Why are you such a prick?
You was right dear; I'm not all right.
I've been on a steady diet of pain killers today. Yum.
I used to be a real bad worrier before my steady spiral towards insanity.
I wish I knew what you wanted from me.
Being without drugs right now is so hard.
www.ihatewomen.com
"The shit that passes for love these days..."
I will have control
"I used to love her, but I had to kill her."
-G and N
If I were still naive I wouldn't know quite what to make of things now.
What did you honestly expect?
"Clue"
So here's an idea, if it doesn't:
...Then I don't FUCKING care. My life is already chock full of lameness, cluster-fuck, and misery. I don't need more.
Here's an excercise for you to better illistrate the point:
Take the thumb and forefinger(your pointer) on your hand of choice and put the tips as close together as you can without them touching. Now, you see that space in between them? Little isn't it? That's too much bullshit in my life. That much. Yes.
Fuck.
"Babies don't sleep this well."
-Jack, from "Fight Club"
The letters on the screen just waved at me. Got to love pain killers.
I am unwell.
"Letter of Resignation"
Dear Society,
I would like to bring it to your attention that your claims were very misleading. I am neither a rock star, nor a stud. I am not driving a Lexus either. And that cologne, well, lets just say super models aren't fucking my brains out until I bark like a dog so that wasn't very honest either.
Sugar and Spice and everything nice? Didn't you mean bitter and spite and all that's not right? Surely I heard wrong. Right?
Those shoes didn't help me run faster, by the way.
And chasing the Krispy Kreme donuts with Diet Coke didn't balance out.
Somtimes people just die. No rhyme or reason. No major battle at the end. No great point made. Sometimes people just die.
But hey, I don't have to worry, because there's always a happy ending... Right?
Damn it. Can't you see that the more I care for you the less I can.
I , too, am sometimes a squirrel; Just trying to get a nut.
And to those of you who don't like me: Fuck you, your mothers, fathers, siblings, and everything else in your life that means something. Right now I've got a huge fucking smile on my face and it's just for you. I hope my existance is the most miserable thing in your life.
"What?"
Why is it, all of a sudden, every girl I know decided I'm the fucking incarnation of evil? What the fuck did I fucking do? Is my annoying habit of taking in oxygen and putting out carbon monoxide getting to be too much. Is the fact I don't have magical powers and can't change reality a sin now?
I'll tell you what; Why don't you bitches go play hide and go fuck yourselves in the center of the fucking gorilla cage at the zoo.
Fuck.
I don't fucking ask for the world here, just some fucking peace is all.
Fuck.
I'm about at the end of my fucking rope and when I snap, it's not just me that's going to be unhappy.
If I ever get terminal cancer with a limited time left to live, there is a list of mother fuckers who's days will be most assuredly ruined.
How about a nice, cold, refreshing two-liter of Shut the Fuck Up?
"Answers"
I want some answers and I want them now.
Why the fuck does everything in my life have to be a fucking struggle?
Why does everyday have to be a concentrated effort to keep going and a lesson in misery?
Why can't I just have one good run?
I want the fucking answers and I want them now. No bullshit theorizing; No fucking long winded soapbox fucking illistration on what a fuck up I am. I want truth and I want the man with the answers right in front of my rosey red fucking mug and I want him looking me in the eyes as he explains these things.
Fuck.
Whores.
"Why don't you put your mouth around my asshole and I give you a hot lunch?"
"Why is it members of the National Organization for Women get mad when I say "sometimes a bitch just needs slapped"?"
-From The North American Imperialist's first contribution
Why do people want to fuck with me? Don't they realize that I'm so stupid that I will fuck myself over just to screw them too.
"Anger Management is Punching You In the Face"
You have the gall to ask why I'm so angry? Fuck you.
Maybe sometimes I see some shit so bad that I can't ignore it.
Maybe sometimes I get tired of seeing the best and brightest fucking off in places they shouldn't be for reasons they shouldn't.
Maybe, sometimes, it's easier to be red with anger than to cry the tears of depression.
I'm willing to bet you don't fucking get it anyway.
Why do people always get angry at me when they see that I don't have magical powers?
Low expectations; High standards, baby.
Or is it the other way around.
My life to this point has been most decidedly less than satisfying.
Don't think this is all about you; You're not that important.
As a side note, I've been shitting more in a day than I used to in three lately. I hope you enjoyed that.
You grant control to others. It's men like me that mean to take it.
